Miss DayCare
Charlotte, NC
Female, 30
I work in a highly respected, franchised Day Care Provider. I have taught in Toddler classrooms as well as Pre-Kindegarten classrooms. It's a wonderful and rewarding profession and I love every minute of it. I have become friends with many of my parents and they all ask questions which is why I want to open a dialogue here so I can be as honest and open as possible about your most prized posession's early childhood education and what really goes on in the classrooms and hallways!
If there is any suspicion regarding a child's home life, we let the director know about our findings and they handle it. I have had this happen only one time in my years of working in this industry and my suspicions were true. It's an awful situation for everyone involved but after all was said and done the mother thanked me (she was a victim of the abuse as well), and she said we helped her find the strength to leave her husband and get her family the help it needed.
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It's pretty equal between the amount of teachers that have kids and those that don't. it definitely helps if you do have kids and need daycare because then you get it at a pretty good deal! I worked at daycare centers for a few years before i had my daughter, and it didn't make me a better parent, but definitely more patient with her. And now being a parent, so of the parents of my kids offer some pretty good advice on things that I would have never thought of on my own. It doesn't make someone a better parent, but it certainly does have its resources you can use.
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You can definitely tell which kids are more advanced by age two just by the milestones that they have reached and passed. I thin I stated above that while you can tell which one is smarter at 2, it may not necessarily be the case by the time they are four and the other kids have caught up and/or passed them. I have taught super smart toddlers and they have gone on to gifted programs at their elementary schools, I also had a child in my pre school class (three years old) that I thought he was going to have the hardest time with school when he got there, but she just began third grade and is reading and writing at a third grade level. Each child develops on their own and that's the best part of my job!
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I have found that by age one they can benefit from being around other toddlers and adults. A lot of SAHM do this for a couple days a week to get their child out of the house and have some free time of their own! Just make sure that you follow the school's schedule (snacks, lunch, nap) the best you can on the days they aren't there to make sure that when they are there, it's not stressful on your child (or their teacher!).
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I've dealt with pretty much everything to a mom coming in every hour on the hour to make sure her child who was potty training got her chance to sit on the toilet (and she did with or without her mother being there). Parents would come in at lunch time to sit with their kids while they ate. I've even had a mom (it's usually the mothers) accost me at a restaurant on a weekend day because she didn't feel her son was getting enough attention at school...mind you this mother was a stay at home mom with only one child and he was in our school mon through fri 7 AM to 6 PM....I'm thinking he wasn't getting enough attention at home but i'm not a licensed psychologist....When I was in an infant classroom I had a mother come in and stay with her baby almost all day and not allow us to build a relationship with her daughter so when we went to go near her the baby would scream and the mom would blame us because we weren't acceptable caregivers and didn't know how to act around her daughter. I do welcome over protective parents and accept their neurosis to an extent, but when it interferes with my job and my classroom, I need to have an open and honest conversation with them usually with a director present so it's documented. I've found that an open dialogue is key with these types of parents and they tend to back off and trust you a bit more once everything is out in the open....this is only the tip of the iceberg....I could write a book with this question alone!
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Placing a 2 year old in a time out his first week? That seems kind of crazy to me too and as a mother myself I wouldn't be happy either! As much as I want to answer a stern NO to your question, I cannot. The reason why I say that is because timeouts are a simple and effective way to dealing with a problem (especially at 2 years old). I personally do not use a timeout method for disciplining my own child or the kids in my classes, so I have had no complaints in this department. I only answer this way because I have seen this in every facility I have worked in when parents are unhappy with a disciplinary measure taken in the classroom. The director is always going to side with the parent (after all they are paying for the service), notify the teacher, and it's up to the teacher to uphold the agreement of not using the time out method (in your case it seems a bit extreme, I cannot believe they did that to a two year old!). Until your child can communicate with you and tell you every aspect of his/her day in the classroom, you must trust your teacher (and that builds over time) that they aren't going against your wishes and if they are find somewhere else to go because there are plenty of places that are fantastic and wouldn't do that to you or your child. I can understand making a mistake once but if it happens again and you've already had an agreement in place, that's unacceptable. I hate to sound negative or put you on edge, and I wish I could have a more definite answer for you. My gut is telling me that they are continuing with the timeouts because I have seen it over and over again even after a parents asks them not to.
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Look at the cleanliness of the facility and the rooms, also when walking around the school peek into other classrooms and not just the ones that your child(ren) will be in. See what the teachers are doing, are they interacting with the kids or just sitting there? Ask to see when the kids play outside and how interactive the instructors are with them. We shouldn't be just sitting on the ground yelling at the kids when someone does something wrong. We should be running around, playing tag, pushing them on a swing, etc....Another big one is if there is "outside" food in the rooms (we aren't supposed to have any outside food or drinks in the room), and you would be surprised at what some teacher leave out....I was coming back from lunch and one of my co workers had a bag of peanuts out during the kids' nap! Also, see if the center has a reference list of parents you can call to see how they like the school. Parents put themselves on it and it's a mix of positive and negative reviews so you can get answers to questions you may not be comfortable asking the director
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